We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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