I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
