You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Shame - the story of my life.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
