He is such a slut. More and more my type.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
