Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Enjoy the penises
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
