i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Randomize
