More tranny stories later!
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
