He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
