I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
