wanna go halves on a baby?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
