I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Randomize
