Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
