the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
