And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
