At least make sure they are 18
Why
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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