Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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