Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
How does it feel to date your dad?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize