She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize