Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
