so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
