there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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