just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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