Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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