who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
