before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
