So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
why is half of my head shaved?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
