He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
