that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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