Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
My breasts were aching with rage.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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