I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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