This is not my ceiling
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
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