At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
