So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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