i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
how drunk are you?
Several
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
