I'm really into asian looking animals
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Randomize
