Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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