Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize