so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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