He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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