Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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