plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
