that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
so let's talk penis.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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