Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
