Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize