It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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