also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
