Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
She told me I should be a condom model.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
