tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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