oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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