Kiss
Puke
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
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